


The Analysis of the Pie-Baker Family (Mostly Uncle Bernard)

by That1Demon64



Category: Original Work
Genre: Analysis, Every character listed is mentioned, Family Drama, Family History, Gen, Implied/Referenced Violence, OCs - Freeform, Original work - Freeform, Past, Questioning the past, like lowkey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26908462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That1Demon64/pseuds/That1Demon64
Summary: Souda Baker’s family was a mystery, specifically his uncle Bernard. That man was never discussed around his house, rarely showed up to family events, and the only way he knew of his existence for a while was through the cards he’d send on the holidays. As any sixteen year old would wonder, what’s the deal with Uncle Bernard. Along with a few more questions. But mostly Bernard.





	The Analysis of the Pie-Baker Family (Mostly Uncle Bernard)

Souda’s family was weird. He’d noticed that they weren’t like average families years ago. There wasn’t anything inherently strange about that at first, just a mom, a dad, and their only son. Most families he had seen on tv had a similar dynamic, just with an extra sibling and maybe a dog or cat. He didn’t feel out of place because he didn’t have some younger sister who wanted him dead, or because he didn’t have an older brother who was a total jock, but something else.  


They rarely talked about his mom’s side of the family. Like, ever.

His mom, Pinelopi Pie, now Pinelopi Pie-Baker, was a sweet and understanding woman. She did what she could for her family and more, she was a wonderful chef, and alongside his dad, Spice Baker, they opened the Pie-Baker Bakery. The word ‘Baker’ has been mentioned too many times so far, but this will stop soon. Back on track, she was a great mom. Souda wouldn’t ask for another mom even if he was offered a lifetime supply of money.

But, her family was a mystery. Yeah, it wasn’t like he never saw his extended family, he talked to his aunt Delomia and his cousins Madeline, Cecila and Mauve every now and then, visiting them during Christmas and other holidays, so it was never a scenario where he never knew anyone else from the Pie family. It’s just that, outside of his aunt and cousins, things were scarce. Specifically with his uncle, Bernard.

No one talked about Uncle Bernard.

Souda knew very basic information about him. He was his mom’s twin brother, meaning they were the same age. His nickname was Berry, since being named after a dog breed isn’t the best name in the book. He didn’t have kids, wasn’t married, and no one knew where he lived or if he had a job. Every besides his name, birthday and whether he had a family of his own was unknown. He was a man of mystery. 

He mostly knew him from the letters he sends, they mostly came on holidays and birthdays, Souda knew his cousins got letters too. The letters followed a standard Happy [Holiday] Card format; Dear [Name], text in between, From Bernard, a few XOs, and a twenty dollar bill taped to the bottom. He’d write generic messages, telling Souda to have a good day, “Say hi to your mom and dad for me”, asking Souda to tell his mom he was sorry he couldn’t make it to whatever family get together happened around that time and that he was busy, etc…. There were two times in counting when Bernard sent a letter that wasn’t correlating to his birthday or Thanksgiving, both times had a package attached; once some new clothes, and the other some books he thought he might like. Both times the letters read “I was clearing out some old stuff when I found these, I thought you might like them, if you don’t you can throw them away, I don’t care.” Souda’s impression of him was very chill, maybe a little too chill.

The first time he met him in person was at a Christmas party he went to when he was twelve. Bernard and Pinelopi exchanged a hug, Bernard commented on how Souda was very tall for his age, corrected himself when he was told Souda was his new name and he preferred he/him, ate some turkey, then spent the rest of the dinner just hanging out in the corner on his phone. He’s been to a few more get togethers, but stays in the corner and avoids everyone. Souda often joined him. They stood together on their phones avoiding the party in complete silence, with maybe some small talk, it was nice.

Bernard seemed like a nice guy, like a very chill uncle you’d see on a sitcom. Mostly stayed out of family affairs, shows up randomly, makes some jokes and eats, then vanishes again until the show calls for him to be some comic relief once more. Souda liked him, based on what he knew of him.

His parents didn’t. Pinelopi seemed to hold a bit of resentment towards him. His mom never held grudges, and when she did, there was a great reason for it. As a result, he was never brought up. Souda never asked what Bernard did to piss his mom off, it wasn’t his business, but he couldn’t help but wonder what happened.

What made him even more curious was that his dad didn’t even talk about him, like he held the same grudge Pinelopi did. Whenever they saw Bernard at a party, Spice would clear his throat and excuse himself for a moment, once he came back he’d avoid Bernard until it was time to go. Pinelopi would’ve done the same, but she was too well mannered, that Christmas dinner hug  _ was  _ very awkward, though. Once again, Souda never asked what Bernard did to his dad, but it didn’t stop him from wondering. It wasn’t like Bernard wasn’t the only not-talked-about family member. 

His grandparents were never discussed, hell, he didn’t have grandparents! None that he was aware of, anyway. He learned that his grandma (on his mom’s side) died when he was four years old, after he asked his mom why the other kids at school have grandma’s and he doesn’t at the ripe age of nine. He just assumed the rest of his grandparents were dead, too. Kind of morbid but hey, death just happens, especially to old people. 

Still, Grandma Pie was never brought up after that point. He wondered if his mom had some grudge against her, and if so, once again, why? Naturally, his mind wandered to some elaborate and depressing reasons, but he decided it was better for him to keep his mouth shut than ask his mom if his dark theory of why his dead grandma isn’t talked about often is true or not. 

Back to Bernard, the most he could inquire about him is that he went to high school with his mom, dad, and some of their other friends. After digging through some old photos in storage, he found some photos labeled with “Class of 2001”, featuring his parents, Bernard, some girl named Rachelle, and a guy named Mercury. There was also a sixth figure; Nicholas Assa.

Nicholas was a legend amongst Karson, for all the wrong reasons. Two months after graduation, he was found dead in an alleyway, beaten to death. What’s worse is that they never found his killer, it’s been a cold case for nineteen years. He had also learned (through internet search engines) that his mom, dad, Bernard, and their two other friends were all suspects in the crime, based solely on the fact they had all seen him that day. None of them were arrested or heavily questioned, all of them had sturdy alibis, and it didn’t seem like any of them would have a motive for murder.

The case was extremely popular, but died down in recent years after people realized obsessing over finding a dead man’s killer nearly two decades later wasn’t worth it. And he knew better than to ask his parents in depth stuff about the death of their friend that happened nearly two decades ago. He had the internet archives for that. 

Still, he wondered… maybe the riff between his parents and uncle Bernard was caused by something that happened in high school. Or… maybe an incident after high school. He stopped himself from thinking about it further, because there was no way a member of his family could’ve done something like that.

He sighed, he’d decided to ask Bernard why his parents don’t talk about him at the next gathering he sees him at. Nothing too direct like “Hey, why does my mom hate your guts?” Maybe a softer approach, like, “So, any idea why my mom and dad don’t really bring you up that much?” Yeah, that’ll do it. It’s not like he’ll lie about it, and it could lead to a very interesting conversation.

Maybe he’ll crack one layer of the Pie-Baker family secrets, once and for all.


End file.
